The Emotional Ups and Downs of a Short Sale… Finding Your Balance

Unfortunately, if you are facing a short sale, it is most likely something that you cannot avoid. Everyone’s Short Sale experience is completely different and I can only share mine. I can also tell you that in the end, everything is going to be ok and you will be able to move forward with your life.

Just as I wasn’t, I’m sure you aren’t ready to deal with everything that comes along with doing a Short Sale… the emotions, the mountains of paperwork, the waiting game, the renegotiating, the disapproval of an offer, multiple offers, losing a buyer… and the list goes on and on. I don’t know if anyone could ever prepare to deal with everything on such an emotional level.

There are two ways to deal with your Short Sale… head on or avoidance. I remember the feeling of failure I had when I came to the acceptance that a Short Sale was the only way I was going to avoid other financial burdens down the road; for me it was the only thing that I could do, no matter how disheartening. I was lucky to have a great Realtor and Broker by my side every step of the way. Without them in my corner, I don’t know if I would have pulled through.

You would think it would be easier to know that you’re not the only one dealing with losing their home. No matter what corner I seemed to turn, there were Short Sale signs galore. In the beginning, this didn’t give me much comfort. I have to say though as time went by, it did help to know that I wasn’t alone. Once this becomes your reality, and we all come this reality in our own time, things do start getting easier. I didn’t say less aggravating or stressful, but still easier.

Dianne Hicks in California gives four great pieces of advice that I think are worth sharing. (See her entire article at http://www.trulia.com/blog/dianne_hicks/2010/09/short_sale_dealing_with_the_emotional_roller_coaster)

1. You may get a bit frustrated with all the paperwork the bank wants. Just bite the bullet, sit down and get it all over with. It will be much easier once it is off your plate. Prolonging this will just keep it in the back of your mind. At this point, you should feel a sense of relief because your Realtor will now take over dealing with the bank. Therefore, from this point forward, you will have very little interaction with the bank and this should be a relief. Just be sure to give your Realtor a heads-up when you do receive any communication from your bank. In the meantime, concentrate on you and your family.
2. You will probably get super annoyed when Realtors call because someone wants to see your house, especially when it’s extra inconvenient. Try your best to keep your cool. You can request to have 24-hour notice to help avoid this dilemma. When you are going through a Short Sale, the emotional side of you can make you feel less tolerant to show your home. Unfortunately, it is a necessary part of the process, so it is key to figure out what works best for you. She strongly suggests giving your home a good spring cleaning and declutter. The house will show much better and hopefully will lead to an accepted offer much more quickly.
3. You get an offer and your Realtor submits it to the bank… now what? This is a good opportunity for you to take a breath and allow the emotional healing to begin. You are now faced with some time for reflection and direction. Both are equally important to help you understand that this may very well be the best thing that can happen in your circumstances. If your Realtor can help close the deal totally clean, try to see it as a blessing. It doesn’t have to all be negative. Try to look at this as a new beginning and it can be exciting to have a new beginning. It’s true, your credit will take a hit — work on getting your credit in order because you may be able to purchase in as little as two years from this point, if owning a home again is a strong desire.
4. Reach out to family, friends and your Realtor for moral support. Learn from mistakes and move on because it would be a shame to waste time with negative energy.

If you are in need of Short Sale advice or a seasoned Short Sale Realtor, please give our office a call and we’ll connect you with an agent that will help you see the light! Good luck!!

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